"I was born and raised in the bible belt here in America.
My great great grandparents, my great-grandparents, and my grandparents, as well as my sister’s husband were all preachers of christianity. I was raised in a strict pentecostal home. We went to church on Sundays and Wednesdays.
In the church they would speak this tongue and say it was holy ghost or holy spirit.
My sister and all I knew there had recieved this holy ghost but no matter how hard I cried, nor how hard I begged God for this gift I never recieved it. I saw them run around the church and worship at the altar, and I never felt the urge to run with the spirit.
At 14 yrs of age I became pregnant and the preacher got in front of the church and used me a example of a sinner.
He condemned me to hell and said I had no business there with the people of God. That Jesus didn’t accept me. I walked out of the church and have not gone back. I moved away from God.
I had thought if God does not forgive me for this what sense is there to pray. If my soul is destined to hell already why try anymore?For years I believed nothing. Times got harder for me and I started crying out to God yet again. This time I didn’t pray for the gift of holy ghost, I prayed for guidance, that he would lead me to him and the truth.
As I was telling a friend one day on how lost I felt, how I wanted to love God, and how I wanted God to accept me in heaven not send me to hell, my friend says to me
” I know you are not muslim, but for your sake of sanity and peace, please read the Quran”If only just for some peace. At that time my mind was tortured, I was emotionally a wreck.
I wasn’t going to read the Quran, I had been told Islam was the home of Anti-christ and that Islam was evil. But it kept on my mind to read the Quran..
I thought well my friend is not evil and it could not hurt to read it. I searched all the stores in my hometown and no Quran. So I searched online.
I found on www.quranexplorer.com .
I started reading the Quran and saw no evil, nothing that I had been taught about the bad in Islam was in the Quran.[Amazing]
I was amazed to learn that Allah was the same God of Jesus(peace be upon him). I read about Muhammed (peace be upon him) and learned he was not an evil man, but a good man.
Everything I had been taught about Islam and prophet Muhammed by the church were all lies.
So I started looking up things on Islam in addition to reading the Quran.
I hid what I was doing from everyone I knew, even deleting my history on the internet. I believed the Quran where I always doubted the bible. This was amazing to me.
I thought to myself I actually love God. Allah will forgive my sins. I still have the chance for heaven. Many emotions went through me.
The day I took my shahada was the happiest day of my life. I will never be able to explain the feeling of peace and acceptance I finally felt after a life of confusion and helplessness.For anyone who has ever thought they were meant to go to hell, they would understand this feeling. I immediately went to prayer, teaching myself the prayers, immediately took to the hijab.
The day I took my shahada, I announced to my family I was now muslim. It has been hard for me.My children’s father tried everything to get me to turn against Islam. Once he saw I would not turn from Allah, he wanted to know why.I talked to him and told him all I had learned. He converted to Islam too,
Many spit on me, call me a non-american and terrorist, I was physically attacked. Some of my family has disowned me.My mother thinks it is a phase I’m going through but still defends me.
My sister refuses to let me speak of Islam at all, and makes a point to say ” thank you jesus and jesus loves you” in front of me and my children. In times like this I just smile, ignore, or say “sorry you feel the way you do” I realize that if I resort to anger then it will confirm people’s belief that Islam is bad.My son took it all the hardest because of his loyalty to my mother and sister, but I am proud to say all four of my children have now took to learning the prayers.
May Allah guide me in teaching them.
I know all there is about the holy bible, I have read it, been taught it all my life. It contradicts itself.
The Quran speaks truth and I hope that many realize this before the doors of heaven close on forgiveness."
[Sister Aisha]
Oh My dear sister in Islam,
I cant stop my tears by reading your story…
We’re proud of you, in fact approx 1.68 billion Muslims are proud of you .. The most best thing is The ways by which Allah guide people is truly amazing. MashaAllah.. SubhanAllah!
May Allah bless you and reward you highest place in Jannah
Ameen
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